Older.

I turned 18 three days ago. I don't know how I feel about this. I don't really care, I guess. "It's just another day". My motto. But that day does signify time passing. This year I have changed so much. I was sitting in Starbucks reading on my birthday and...I made some careless motion. Completely insignificant, haphazard. Yet it was my mother. It was the way I moved my chin...I can't even explain it. But as soon as I did it, I knew that my mother does that. That's her mannerism. And now it's mine? I have always been the miniature Sharon, which has mostly just been an annoying thing people say. But within this year I have so much seen my mother in myself. My mom is an amazing woman. But she's my mom and I am the way I am largely because of her. And yet, other people live differently than my mother lives. So, just because I haven't come to realize that before I've slowly morphed into her, does that mean I am stuck on the path of Her? I don't think so. Not necessarily. I have also realized this past year that I am entirely different than my mom. I have unrealistic desires and passions that I really do want to pursue, even if it takes spurts of effort here and there...I'd love to record a cd. I'd love to purchase a professional camera and capture everything I see. I'd love to be the kind of mom mine is...the kind that stays home all the time because she truly like us--she'd rather spend time with us, my dad, brother, and myself, than spend time with her girlfriends (her ya-ya's). But I so desire to be the mom someday who's constantly capturing these moments with film, with words, with songs. I really want to inspire my kids to be artistically freeeee. It's a weird thing. But I have a passion for this. A desire...that I think my grandmother always had. But her life was ladden with her own issues, problems, financial, relational, etc. Let's face it--they were dysfunctional. I want to be functional, and supportive of my kids. If I have any. I guess I have to work on the whole husband part first. Which oh my goodness I can hardly imagine. Still. My mom, at the birthday dinner, said that next year "she [I] will be blowing us off for her boyfriend". I haven't had a Valentine date ever. Why would next year change that? Just because my commitment to stay single will be over doesn't mean I will miraculously fall for someone when I haven't had nearly the slightest inclination to do so in the past four years. Part of me wishes it would happen. Another part of me screams NO NO NO!!! I like myself just the lonely way I am...free to think and write and support myself just fine...without that potential worry of "What does he think about what I just wrote, or sang, or painted".

I don't know what I want. I am torn between two worlds. Each has it's ups and downs...and yet neither really matter so much at all because, after all, they are just worlds. For now I will stick here...with those dashing fellows up there...my family.

The future looks bright though. Scary...frustrating...positively unpredictable...but beautiful.

Why Hellllloooa There....

I've been thinking a lot lately. About life. Jazz like that. And about the undeniable crazy cat lady in my night class who has bright red in-a-box-from-Target hair, with thick bangs, wrinkly skin, hot pink striped socks, and old beat-up, worn-out, old, old, old dusty white reebok sneaks from the 90s. Thinking thoughts like that. And about how the best chips are the ones I save for last; the ones that are all folded over and extra crunchy. And how elbows are often so pointy and good for jabbing people when they least expect it. Maybe in the jugular so I can get that last folded over, extra crunchy chip at the bottom of the crinkly bag.
I miss my great grandmother and I miss my great aunt. And I miss my voice and I long for the times I only hear about: The whole family of 16 crowded around the old organ with someone strumming away on guitar, someone plucking away at the old bass, someone humming away on the harmonica, and countless cool kids singing under my great grandfather's instruction.
But I only hear about it and I only wonder how different my life would be if I were a part of then.

Retraction, kind of.

Sorry for the last post. I had a personal vendetta against the media that day.
I still kind of feel the same way...but toned down a bit :)

Dead Celeb.

I think I'm being cynical.
I think I'm having a downright cynical day.

I sign into myspace a half hour or so ago to find all these bulletins posted "Heath Ledger is Dead!!!???!!" yada yada.
My first thought was, yes, sad. Death is sad. I looked up a news story and he died of a drug overdose...supposedly. For all I really know he's partying in Tahiti right now. For all any of us know. Yet people seem to really care. And it's rather ticking me off. Perhaps that's wrong. Perhaps we should care and feel compassion for every single one who dies that we hear of. But if, in a few moments, I posted a bulletin that my great grandpa died and I was seriously distraught, no one would repost that. There would be no flood of bulletins, no flood of compassion. And they would know my grandfather just about as much as they know Ledger...a figment of their imagination...a man made up in their own mind. Because the man they see on the screen isn't Heath Ledger. That man was conjured up by multitudes of writers wanting people to peek into the window of their mind. And the Ledger we all saw was a pretty face. I dare say. Let the dead bury the dead. Go talk to your kids and brothers and sisters about overdosing and why you ought not do drugs to be "cool" because being dead isn't so cool. Really.
That is just the thing. Folks think he is the cream of the crop. He's hott, so that of course obviously signifies he's cool, and thusfore is worthy of being idolized. No. No no no no.
It's sad that he did die the way he did...but idolizing the man is ridiculous. He died by overdosinging (likely) and that is not glamorous or cool or worthy of being idolized. Jesus died on a cross, for us, and that is worthy of being worshipped. People get things so confused. They didn't know the man. I get things confused too. All the time. I know I do idolize and put things before the Lord who so amazingly died for me. Who gloriously died. To save me from the very things I idolize. The very thing that, if I let it, will be my destruction. Yes. I get confused too. Don't we all.

Another celebrity died today
Lower his body down into the grave
One night's drug over-dose
And now we're one down to look up to now
And idolize and expand our litany of shrines

Don't look down
Don't follow him now
Look up
Don't look down
A body lowered to the ground
Look up
To the one riding on the clouds
Reigning over all of us
Look up
Forever on a throne he sits
Brighter than Hollywood's shining awards
You, oh Jesus, are worth so much more
Than what we've been looking at.
Than who we've been looking for.

Untitled--Latest Religion?

The children are playing in the yard
Since when do we feel like
They ought to be accompanied by armed guards?
What has this world come to
Do you hear what I’m asking you
What do we subject our young ones to
There’s drugs, sex, and rock and roll
When do you plan to tell them
That they can all takes their less than pleasant toll
Without asking politely
Without asking their permission (at all)
You see
They can slip so easily into the world’s latest religion


While I was on my way to class today, Quinn (3 years old) ran out her front door yelling Sharon, Sharon! Then, Courtney, Courtney! After she could see who I really was...and she came up and she gave me a huge hug. That girl is the sweetest thing. She is so uplifting, even at just 3...I know she will be a great encourager to so many around her when she's older. I can see part of her gifts at just 3 years old. But if those gifts are hindered by the enemy in her life...by not knowing the Lord at all...by just slipping into the world's latest fads, religions, mindsets, etc....she would be so cheated. As would all of us.
I just sat down with my guitar and started playing that Am, C, G, D picking pattern. It's not going anywhere immediately, so I guess that's all for now. But I thought I'd post it for kicks.

And to say that I'm having a slightly melancholy, minor-chord kind of day. Hah

So much to do....

I want to do so much. And yet I have no idea what to do.
Life is fast approaching. On one hand I feel like I have to start making decisions. On the other hand I just want to push them under the rug for as much longer as possible...those awkward things I keep stepping on but am just too lazy to pick up and sort out and place in their rightful places. I don't want to decide whether those dreams I happen to prance upon from time to time might have to go to the trash bin or might be more proudly displayed on the actual path of my life instead of hidden under a (shag) rug.
I've thought I wanted to teach for a while now. But perhaps it's a cop out. It's easy...something that will be waiting when I get out of college. I'll know where to go to get a job. Some district out there. I'll have benefits, retirement. But I don't want to settle because I'm scared of going to college and not knowing what I'm going to do with my life afterward.
I'm the kind of gal who makes lists, you know. The kind who sticks to the list just because it's a list. And if I made the list, that girl, the one in the past, she had to have known what she was thinking, therefore, the list is set in stone, the list is absolutely positively, and unswervingly correct and I have got to follow it. Even if, while that girl was making the list, she said to herself, "I must have forgotten something". I have this mindset that if it's on the list, I cannot stray. I think I have psycological issues. I'm partly kidding...
College is on my list...as is having a plan in general. But maybe I don't have a plan. Maybe I don't know where I'm going to end up. I was dead set on going straight to SDSU and now I don't even know the state of my acceptance. I was dead set on getting a job in the library, but maybe I don't want to stick around school any longer than I have too. Maybe I have no clue what I'm doing....and maybe that's the point. Maybe I don't need my list. Maybe.
Had I gotten accepted last month, like most of my friends, I wouldn't be thinking about this right now. I feel like I have come out of my shell even more this past month and discovered things about myself that I may not have. If I would have gotten accepted right away I would have focused entirely on school and been driven to get in and get everything over with. But now I'm branching out...opening up new ideas in my mind. It's scary and so foreign.
I want to write, this is true. But maybe I like writing songs and poetry more than writing essays. Maybe I don't want to teach. Maybe I'm not passionate about it. Would you like to know what I want to do?
I want to be a publisher. I want to publish my grandmother's book of poems, Nubbins, that she no longer has the energy to see published for herself. I want to write songs and learn how to play the guitar better, and the piano. I want to open up my own cafe and make my own ceramic coffee cups, bowls, and plates, and hand paint them in all sorts of fun styles. I want to sell an eclectic mix of books in a room right off the cafe. I want to sew bags and spend time creating new, fun, exciting, better designs. I want to spend a few hours making simple dress patterns in fun patterns with patches and things and maybe someone would buy one someday. I want to make jewelry; earrings, necklaces, braclets, and wooden things. I want to write books. I want to be a graphic designer and create banners and posters and covers and random, neat, creative things for people. I want everything to be earthy and me. I want to be passionate. I want not to be constrained and confined to societies ideas of success and happiness. I want to be completely random and successful because I am passionate. And I want to do all things through Him. The funny thing is...all these things I want to do...the things that are simply on my "dream" list. They could all possibly tie together someday. I could be random and passionate and it could, theoretically, really work.
I still don't know what to do.
Right now, since I had a 45 minute nap, two consecutive grande starbucks drinks, and teramasu (sp?) and am thusfore wideawake....I will draw out some potential dress and purse patterns before reading, and then going to bed.

What do you want to do with your life?

The Line

We went to Big Bear and I will write a ton about that later, I'm sure...but right now I don't have the pictures, or that kind of motivation...so I would like to pose a question instead....

I have been thinking a lot lately about the things we do daily that we can play off as being unspiritual and insignificant to our personal spirituality. Things like listening to that kind of music, or watching that kind of movie, reading that kind of book, going to that kind of place...so many things we do and just don't necessarily think all too much about it. But what does God think? Does he care all that much if I go see a PG-13 movie that has some vulgarity and inappropriate things that apparently aren't "of God"? Does every movie I see have to be like Facing the Giants? I mean...if we really get down to it, even the cartoons are vulgar these day. Like Shrek...there are many allusion to not so nice things. And music, if I turn on 102.1 am I disappointing God because the people aren't exactly singing His praises? Also, smoking and drinkning...if I smoke a cigar or cigarette, or have a drink...but I'm not addicted by any means, is that sinning? Is that so wrong? Is that so ungodly?
Where is the line? I don't know?
The way I have lived seeing it thus far is that if I don't struggle with the things these movies or music promotes, then it is okay. If I don't struggle with cussing, drinking, sex, etc. then it doesn't affect me all that much, or my spiritual walk, if I go see a movie that isn't so Godly afterall, or if I listen to music that contains some subjects that aren't all that great or moral. Is this a wrong way of taking it? Am I condoning all these things and is that wrong? Am I supposed to watch nothing and listen to only Christian music, read only Christian books, and talk about only Christian things? In a perfect world, how great would that be. But we don't live in a perfect world...we live here. Unfortunately. So what to do? I truly don't know.

I don't drink or smoke...because I have no personal desire to, but maybe someday will, who knows...I do not think I watch awful things, but I don't watch the best things (not that there are bests out there anymore)....I don't think I listen to awful music....but some of it isn't the best....
But where is the line? Is the line the same for everyone? Or does it move according to personal conviction and how things affect people's personal walks with the Lord? I don't know...but I would love your opinion. Really.

Prayerwalking

I decided to really start prayerwalking as one of my several new year's resolutions this year. I went on a lovely walk yesterday and felt refreshed and filled up a bit as I arrived home. But today it was raining and I couldn't walk in the rain...I mean, I could have. But I most likely would have gotten chastized by my mother, we're going to Big Bear for three days, starting Wednesday, and I can't get sick, afterall. I want to write about camp....but I'm just not up for it. What I'm really up for, is some food...I don't know what kind yet. Perhaps oatmeal. Maybe chicken salad sandwiches...maybe both hahh.

Dream Person

Random thought:
Do you ever have dreams with random people in them and you've never met them or came across them before, to your knowledge? Do you ever wonder if those people really exist out there somewhere in the world? Perhaps not their character or personality or mannerisms, but their bodies? That somewhere in this vast world they are walking about...not only in your dreamland, but in reality as well?

I suppose I will likely never know.

On another note, I just spent the last two days with amazing people. Tommy, Jesse, Allie, and James came over last night and we sat by a fire pit in my front yard, guitar-ed, guitar hero-ed, played cards, and ate food. Then today I went to church with Tommy and then met up with James and Allie at James' house...then we went shopping for about 4 hours...probably more. We're hardcore. No, James is hardcore. Finally we went back to James', put in Phantom of the Opera...then James and I got bored, so we put it Friends and played cards. Theeen Sharon made dinner and man she packed my plate full and I could not even begin to finish it. That was funny. She yelled at me to sit back and finish my plate and flustered, I started to sit back down and she just started cracccking up and saying just kiddding. Yeah, good stuff. I don't care much for dinner at other people's houses for that reason :) haha. But it was a fun night....fun couple of days. And tomorrow I'm hanging with Allie and James again since it's New Year's Eve and then camp!! Rad...it's going to be so cold in Big Bear :)

Not Good Enough

Here are my feelings, without the blatant whining.

Sometimes I just don’t feel
Good enough
There are so many other better
Writers and singers out there
And I just don’t feel like people really care
What I have in my heart

But I know
You put Your words inside of me
To sing and present to the world
Even when I can’t see
That people really are receiving
Pieces of You, through me

I will go on
With your plan for now
Though I don’t know
What the future holds
And I can’t see
Beyond these four constraining walls

And, I’ll find my confidence
In the faith I place
In Your words when you say
Your plans for me are good

So I’ll wait
For your blessing to fall
So I’ll wait
To see what your promises will bring
When I sing
Despite it all.

Stand up Straight

My family and I were at the neighbor's house all day learning how to make tamales. It was a lot of fun. But their family is completely different than ours. They kept downing the beers and pouring glasses of wine and cussing like sailors. It was all great fun though....and hilarious. Maybe that's bad to say. But whatever :)
Marion's sister, "Tia" I don't know her real name, actually...was a bit...well, drunk all night and kept talking and talking about random things and some relevant things. But she kept talking about posture, and standing up straight, and putting your shoulders back, and sucking in your stomach (That's why we have stomach muscles after all...) and yada yada. She came up to me once while I had my head on my mom's shoulder, just relaxing, and hit me on the back and said...."Are you slouching?" And stood me upright and said, "Raise your chin, your chin, suck it in, that's why we have stomach muscle, up straight up straight," and I just looked at her like she was crazy. Then I slouched on purpose. Yes, to tick her off. haha. Anyway, the point was...we weren't out. We were in. We were hanging out at Marion's house like we do all the time...chilling out, watching TV, relaxing and enjoying eachother. We were dressed to impress...infact I don't think anyone was there to impress anyone else. Except perhaps Tia. It aggrivated me that when we were supposed to be relaxing, we couldn't even do that...according to Tia. We had to continually stand up straight, continually suck it in, hold our heads high. Why?
So I came home a few minutes later to make cookies for Sean (Marion's husband)...because he wanted some and I was thinking over this whole situation and a song came out instead of real solid thoughts.

Mess

Stand up straight
Suck it in real tight
Watch your life being taken right before your eyes
Because this person isn't really you anymore

With your forced body frame
And your plastered on smile
You can't ever relax
Not even for just a little while

But is it worth it?
Sucking in the real you
Because

Who do you have to prove it to
Who do you have to impress
Who do you have to convince
That you're not a complete mess?

And I'm sorry to digress
But I have news for you my friend
Something you may not like to accept
But Jesus loves your mess

So who do you have to prove it to
Who do you have to impress
If Jesus loves your mess?

You don't have to be glamorous
Don't have to have sparkles and glitter
And flashes of silver and gold
For him to want to hold you
A precious mess in his big strong hands

You know how they sometimes say
One man's trash is another man's treasure
Well, Jesus he sees you as treasure everyday
So don't throw it all away
For weak thin plastic things
That will fade away and break

'Cos you can't keep this up forever
Peel the plastic off your life
And move in freedom
Dancing in broad daylight

Because
Who do you have to prove it to
Who do you have to impress
Who do you have to convince that you're not a complete mess

Who do you have to prove it to
Who do you have to impress
If Jesus really loves your mess?



I guess it's probably not original...but it does seem I always get words about just being yourself, myself, because that's who God created us all to be...and he loves us that way. Not the world's way with rigid restrictions on how things ought to be. Malarky.

My Music

Is posted on Myspace...at www.myspace.com/cdayband
if anyone is interested...
I'll warn you, the sound is really really low, so you'll have to turn up the volume quite a bit, most likely.
And probably be in a really quiet place.
And I can't edit the songs at all...so there are definite mess ups :)

The Ballad of a Blessed Old Man

This was nearly a year ago...and completely random.



The Ballad of a Blessed Old Man

Well I used to know an old man
Named Moe
And he sailed down the river
In an old row boat

And I know I know I know
He’s just so Old
But he ain’t grown cold.

He used to talk to Jesus
In his head or out loud
But he’s the happiest fellow I ever did know
And sometimes I just wish I could be

And I know I know I know

He’s just so Old

But he ain’t grown cold.

Oh Moe,
He’s got his river and his Jesus
And he seems so free
But Oh No,
Moe, What does this mean

If I don’t have a river of life
Running through me…?

Will you let me take a ride
For a while
in your Life boat?


3/24/07

The Beginning of Music

I didn't do anything today besides find old poems or songs I'd written and record them with my guitar and this old microphone I found and plugged into my laptop. I didn't do any studying (though my college finals are all through and high school finals don't start till Monday). I went to church, too...and I can't help but wonder.
I've always loved to write lyrics and poems. I've been in love with music for a few solid years now. I never thought I would switch schools and go to college a year and a half early with people I didn't know at all. I never thought I would lead a high school small group and give lessons just fine. I never thought I'd be able to speak, to meet new people. Now, I never think I'll be able to sing or share my thoughts with the world via songs...but who says it's impossible? If I would have stuck to my belief that it was impossible for me to leave high school early, I wouldn't be where I am today. If I would have stuck to my belief that it was impossible for me to articulate biblical principles to folks my own age, I wouldn't be leading a small group. If I would have stuck to my belief that I would never be able to meet new people and introduce myself to strangers, I never would have met the best friends I have today. So why ought I stick to this belief that it's impossible for me to sing and play my guitar and share my messages through songs? It's not impossible. Well, it is. It has been because for years I have been so reserved and won't sing or play infront of anyone. Perhaps it's time to just let the Lord use me, even here. I suppose he can use me in any way...if I just let myself be open to it...and so very vulnerable. Which scares the living daylights out of me. My songs and poems are my heart laid bare. This is terrifying!
There is alsoalways that little looming possibility that I could just entirely suck at singing and no one would tell me....blast. :P
~cday

Black Cat

I found this poem that doesn't have a title or a date...but I know what it's about and I know when I wrote it. And I like it. I don't know why. I just put the first part, because it's my favorite...from here on you could tell I was losing what, if your opinion merits any, passion I had to begin with. Hah...here you are :) Remember this?

You're talking about the weather
And I'm closing the windows up
Sipping green tea
From a round gold cup
Warm going down,
Unlike the frigid wind's sound
And
There's a black cat on the cold dark cement
Illuminated by the street lights
And the fireflies,
That should be in hiding
For winter's come and's now residing--
But they're in my stomach now
and coming out my mouth
The words fall out the window
And the black cat just meows.

Lyrical Legos

I played with Legos yesterday.
It felt good…
Reminiscent of childhood…
Doing things, physically, not just abstractly.
But really getting in there, touching pieces,
And making things.
So much of what I do is not solid.
So much of what I make cannot be touched.
Thoughts remain unreachable.
Words are but an essence…not physical.
Lyrics float on invisible lines in the air…
I wish I could touch them.
I wish I could form my hands around them and hold them and caress them and put them in their rightful place…
That thought means this word there, not here. And this melody here, not there.
But it’s all in the air…
A breeze, a spirit, a vapor, a wind.
Intangible.

Book

One day, I will write a book, and blow everyone's socks off...and it will be the most scary thing I will have ever done, and yet I will feel so free.
Everything will be an open book; my life.

Out of the Mainstream Beauty

I want to take
Photographs
Of life’s great schemes
Toss them around in a big wooden bowl
With salad dressing the taste of beauty

Would you come with me
On this out of the mainstream
Journey
To forever

We can write everything down
The odd little sounds
The door makes on our way out
The sound of the morning dew on the grass
And the last sip of coffee that will just have to last

Along our journey
To forever

Would you come with me
On this out of the mainstream
Journey
To far beyond
What the eye can perceive
in a glimpse of grotesque reality

We can take notes
On the palates of our hearts
To keep for eternity
And share with the souls
Intertwined with freedom
As we are

Along our journey
To forever
And so much more.

-----------

All I've wanted to do lately is sit and write. Or draw. But mostly write. And sing and play guitar.

This poem came from the thinking that people don't see beauty. It's everywhere...life is a never ending process of beauty. You don't have to travel over seas to see something exquisite. Use your imagination--don't just walk by life not realizing that you are held captive, in this vast universe, by beautiful things all day--you are intertwined with it, whether you like it or not, and yet you are free to see it whenever you please. The ugly things can be beautiful. Something so simple can be poetic and come alive!--as long as you don't write it off as artistically dead to begin with.

Sometimes I wish people saw life through my eyes.

Other times I know they'd think I was constantly insane.

So come on this journey with me...if you dare...to twist things a little and see them as beautiful.

The Hide-and-Seek Darkness

So I wrote this song last night, on a whim. I picked up my guitar and started picking some random stuff and words actually came out and I was able to continue picking.
I just wrote what I said, tweaking a few words here and there.
But I think it's how I feel sometimes...in those low places, where I just want to be all light-happy-and-joyous appearing but I just don't feel that way. I wish, often, that I can just pull that "good attitude" out of my pocket. Like that's what a Christian is supposed to do. I know this isn't human-nature and it's not normal to be perky and happy all the time. The Lord lets us feel down. We do go through peaks and valleys. Sometimes I feel like it's a game of hide-and-seek...the happiness, lightness, and brighness of life goes away, so we have to seek it again, and in doing so we seek the Lord.
The song is in wont of more...which will likely come eventually. Right now I'm just excited at my first "full" picking song hah! This is the gist of it:

The Hide-and-Seek Darkness

I walk through life
Wondering where to find you
Where are you hiding
How about you come and find me

With your hair the same shade as mine
And a deeper shimmer in your eye
A laugh but an echo of mine
And a bigger more sincere smile

Where can I find you
My other self in warmer hue
A spirit so divine
And entertwined with heaven's light

Come shine through
The hide and seek darkness
12/02/07

Sugar, Sugar--Russshhhh

Who knew I would be working with Jr. Highers--and enjoying it. Tonight "my" Jr. High girls group came over. We were supposed to play the game "bigger & better", while looking at the sporadic displays of lights already adorning houses in the neighborhood. We were then supposed to stay outside, light the fire pit, and I was going to give a message, then we could worship back at the church. However, God decided to be funny and made it rain. And I'm not talking a light drizzle where running around and dancing in the rain would still be a quite plausible and even enjoyable way for an 11 or 12 year old girl to spend an alotted two hours. No, this was a down-pour. A constant, yet unpredictable down-pour all day. It would stop raingin for literally two minutes, then pick up again by the time I could run across the street to borrow a single egg and run back, un-jacket-ed and get soaked, hah! The point is, I never before realized how small our house is. We have had multiple Christmas parties--with adults, who take up much more space than the 20 or so people here tonight. Yet the house immediately shrunk, honest to goodness, as these awkward young girls started flooding the doorway, not exactly sure what to do with themselves and flailing all over the place like wild monkeys on 3-week-old bananas bursting with sugar molecules. Except their sugar-bananas of choice were actually massive amounts of sugar cookies and graham crackers all heavily coated with multiple colors of frosting.

Insanity!

And yet....I wouldn't have had it any other way, really.

It amazed me :)

This is what we're here for...to not worry about how much frosting or chocolate is getting ground into the carpet. To not worry about how there's probably apple cider spilt in places we couldn't currently imagine. We're here to get these girls together, watch them in their awkward stages all the way until their blossoming fully into beautiful, mature young women of Christ, and maybe even beyond. We're here to lead them into a quiet place, teach them truths of the Word and worship our Maker.

I gave an adapted message of the "What does God think of your feet?" topic I also gave at my high school group about a month or so ago...perhaps longer. They actually calmed down and I have no idea how receptive they were. I have no clue if they got anything from it, if it made a lick of sense...but that's not of my doing or fulfillment to know, I suppose. They were, I do hope, the Lord's words and his to wriggle into the hearts of those moldable girls.

It does remind me that this is what I want to do. I do love to teach...to explain and shed light. Yet I sometimes doubt it...that it's just this idea I have and that, infact, I am no good at articulating truths at all...I suppose I will find out someday, where my road will lead. Whether it be teaching, or not.

For now, I have pictures :)

Tiana and Mariko...the red nose reindeer?

Hayley, Tiana, Mariko...decorating their sugar cookies

The crew, making graham cracker houses :)

Time to settle down and have a message....about feet. Hah

These girls truly are a blessing and tonight was crazily wonderful.

2 cups of coffee that did me no good while they were here (as I was still apparently dragging and wiped out from baking all afternoon) is now taking a grip on my system and doesn't seem to want to release me to the comfort of my bed and a deep, much desired and needed, sleep.

Perhaps in a few hours...