As I'm having to tap back into it, I'm digging up all these past feelings and it hurts a bit. It makes me think that perhaps I'm so anti-relationships because turning it off means not getting hurt. Turning it off means no pain, no disappointments. No unrequited love. On one hand my mind knows that love at this age, whereas graspable I'm sure, is just not realistic and intelligent to seek after at all. It doesn't make sense for the now. But another facet may well be that I am truly holding back because I fear it as well. I want to be strong and leaning on someone else is not? I'm confused; and yes, love scares me.
6 comments:
You once said:
"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it careful round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broked; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredemable...The only place outside Heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers...of love is Hell." (C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves.)
Don't know if it's relevant, but I was reminded of it nonetheless and wanted to share it.
i think you've shared that with me before haha
haha love, man that's such a word. If you want it to be, it can be; just a word I mean. Don't worry though, love is a scary thing, and powerful at that. It's almost like the sun, beautiful from afar, but sometimes it's hard to get close for fear of getting burnt. How'd your sonnet turn out?
most definitely. great analogy.
and my sonnet...well i don't know yet. i rewrote it almost completely though hah!
thanks, it still sounds interesting. I really like your writing
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